:)

Ah Beng's FutureCard ( Likely Scenerio )


Operator: "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut Geylang. May I have your..."


Ah Beng: "Haloo, arh...can I orler huh..."


Operator: "Can I have your Future Card number first, Sir?"


Ah Beng: "It's arh..., hold on prease, arh..... S6102-0499-54610FC"


Operator: "OK... you're... Tan Ah Beng alias 'Or Kwee Tao' and you're
calling from 17-D Lorong 14, Geylang. Your home number is 6782 8828, your
office 6782 8838 and your mobile is 96828848. Which number are you calling
from now Sir?


Ah Beng: "Home lah! Wah Lan...How you get all my phone lumbers, arh?"


Operator: "We are connected to the 'FutureCard' system Sir"


Ah Beng: "OK lah, okay lah...Can I orler your Seafood Pisar..."


Operator : "That's not a good idea Sir"


Ah Beng: "Why....Cannot arh?"


Operator: "According to your latest medical records, you have high blood
pressure and even higher cholesterol level Sir"


Ah Beng: "What?...Wah Lan!....medical lecords also hab... you lecommend
lah?"


Operator: "Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. You'll like it"


Ah Beng: "Wah...How you know I like Hokkien mee, arh?"


Operator: "You borrowed a book entitled "Popular Hokkien Dishes" from the
National Library last week Sir"


Ah Beng: "OK...OK...Buay Ta Han... I give up... Gif me three family
sized ones then, how much arh?


Operator: "That should be enough for your family of 10, Sir. The total is
$45..."


Ah Beng: "I pay by FutureCard...Can or Not ?"


Operator: "I'm afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card is
over the limit and you're owing your bank $6720.55- since October last
year"


Ah Beng: "Ka Nee Nah!... Everything also know...chiat lat!"


Operator: "That's not including the late payment charges on yourhousing
loan Sir.


Ah Beng: "Okay lah...I run to ATM and withdraw some cash before you come
my house lor"


Operator : "You can't Sir. Based on the records, you've reached your daily
limit on machine withdrawal today....with the latest withdrawal of $250 for
4D and TOTO at 2.46pm"


Ah Beng: "Never mind just send the pizzas, I borrow money from my Ah
Mah. How long arh?"


Operator: "About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can't wait you can always
come and collect it on your motorcycle...it'll be ready in 15 mins and you
are only 5 mins away"


Ah Beng: "Where got transport?"


Operator: "According to the details in your FutureCard", you own a Honda
Scooter, ...registration number FE 3288..."


Ah Beng: "Ka Nee Nah!"


Operator : "Better watch your language Sir. Remember on 15th July 1987 you
were convicted of using abusive language on a policeman... ?"


Ah Beng: [Speechless and calms down after being reminded of the brush
with the law]


Operator: "Is there anything else Sir?"


Ah Beng: "Nothing... by the way... still got stock of that 3 free
bottles of cola as advertised or not?"


Operator: "We normally would Sir, but based on your records you're also
diabetic....... "


Ah Beng: [Heard cursing away as he slams down the phone and telling his
family he is going to the Hawker Centre to 'Tar Pow']